Do you ever get so overwhelmed by thoughts and to-dos you want to say no more? No more laundry, no more dishes, no more chores, no more to-dos. No. No. No. I do, and then I do a pretty good impression of my four-year-old self throwing a tantrum. So, the question is, can we do anything to calm this beastly feeling?
I’m going to share the three ideas on how to feel less overwhelmed. I like them because they are not about time management or saying no to obligations. Instead, they are about changing the way we think about the things causing the overwhelmed feelings.
- Embrace Imperfect. I can get behind this one. Perfect is exhausting, and time consuming. Do you really need to vacuum twice over each floor and slowly? Are the clothes clean and relatively wrinkle free? Can a to-do go unfinished? Some things will rise to the level of must do, others can be put off. Imperfect and incomplete for now are okay. We don’t have to have everything done in order to feel good about where we are.
- Visualize Calm and Accomplished. Visualization is such a great tool. I used this technique to conquer running hurdles in high school, and I became really good at them. I felt more confident too. I’m definitely putting this back into practice. I can imagine accomplishing the things on my to-do list from this perspective versus simply thinking about them on an endless taunting loop.
- Question Negative Thoughts. It’s serendipitous how this popped up. Ask if they’re true. Ask what can be learned from the situation causing the feelings. Ask what else the negative thoughts could mean. I’ve learned sometimes my negative thought is actually masking fear. Right now, I know completing all my to-dos means I have no more excuses not to write regularly, and dragging my feet on writing comes from fear that it won’t be good enough. No more fear. (When I hit the no more fear stage, I’ll be sure to write about it!)
In coming to this peaceful feeling I have now, I say embrace the overwhelmed feelings and see what can be learned from them. I walked around in a haze of overwhelm today and finally stopped and questioned what was causing it. I realized it was fear of not knowing what’s next, in writing, in my career, in life in general. I am amazed that in slowing down, exploring what was going on, and refocusing my thoughts to what was possible, I was able to change my thoughts and how I felt.
Finally, remember-
“…No one ever told her it was okay to make mistakes. No one told her there was nothing wrong with needing help. No one told her it was normal to feel upset, or angry, or overwhelmed now and then. Everyone in her life took her perfectionism for granted and didn’t realize how suffocating it was. And because no one gave the young woman permission to be human, she thought she was a failure for being one.”
― Chris Colfer, Worlds Collide
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